It’s Presidents’ Day on the Big Bad Sad Cast this week! The gang discusses botched butt surgery, Donald Trump hosting SNL, and the dangers of chewing gum.
Okay folks, so as most of you may know (and for those who don’t what in the hell are you doing?) This Sunday is Valentines Day!!!!!
I don’t dislike Valentines Day, it is just the fact that it is another holiday for the capitalist machine to grab a bunch of money. Really everyday should be that special for you and your special friend. But I am not writing to bore you with stories of lost love, hopeless romanticism or geeky dating advice.
I am here to give you the best (these could also be terrible) valentine match ups of game characters!
Now I have always wondered if game universes were to collide what romantic relationships would spawn from them. For some reason I have always felt that Princess Peach and Master Chief would go really well together. Some of you are definitely think what is this guy on? Did he eat to many mushrooms from the Mushroom Kingdom? (be for warned, there are going to be plenty of terrible jokes.)
Hear me out. They both have a lot to talk about! Like countless adventures, fights, and a pretty substantial following so they would be a good celebrity couple. Additionally, we all need to accept the fact that Mario and peaches relationship is going no where. Just think about it!
I imagine the date going something like this.
- At 7:31 PM Master Chief pulls up in his Warthog to pick Peach up from her castle. 7:31 because he doesn’t want to appear to eager
- At 8:00 PM they arrive at a restaurant with lots of stars, hearts and pink. Master Chief did his research.
- At 8:30 PM they order food and Master Chief sits there quietly as Peach talks his helmet off!
- Peach sees Master Chiefs face…mission accomplished.
Honestly the world could really benefit from a positive game duo as these to. Though, I would plead that a combination of Halo and any peach game never exists.
Hawt! (Courtesy from www.gamerevolution.com)
Now this one will probably be my favorite, but imagine Bowser and Donald Trump. Yes, I know Donald Trump isn’t a game character but at this point can we really tell the difference?
I feel like these two could really go places. They both have lost everything numerous times and gained it all back, some how. They both are crazy. And I wouldn’t trust either of them to run a country. Even one made out of mushrooms.
Besides, look at that hair! (toprightnews.com)
A relationship that would actually work really well is Lara Croft and James Bond. After all, they both work well alone, but would be even better together. They definitely like adventure. They’re very strong individuals. This is so good, I don’t even have any jokes to make about them. It’s a hole in one!
Side note: Indiana Jones and Lara croft should NOT be together, because he is way to old for her.
Then for my final ship of today: Samus and Buzz Lightyear! Okay first of, it still surprises me how many people don’t know Samus is a girl. She is a girl!
These two would work really well together they both shoot stuff out/off of their arm. They enjoy wearing powerful suits. They like defeating bad guys and I think would raise some really nice children. Imagine how successful those children could be with those jeans… or should I say bionic pants!
Okay that is my last terrible joke! Have a great week and a Happy Valentines Day! Also don’t forget to watch our video of What Not To Say On a Date!
Featured image from blingee.com
-Ollie, A Chocolate Conoscere (Test chocolate in preparation for Sunday!)